You know, I so love to keep little things that people give me. It’s like, I feel connected (shut up) to those people.
I was rummaging through my memory box and I saw lots of things that I can’t help but to smile at. Memories.
No, I’m not writing all this because 2008 will bid us farewell in less than 4 hours time. I’m writing for the sake of letting go of my feelings.
I was walking towards school yesterday and lots of couples passed by. So I was wondering, why do we fall in love? Yea, I know it’s a feeling that God created but really, we walk into this world alone and we walk off alone.
People don’t really care what happen to you because they don’t lead our life. Every one in our life come and go, just like that. We can be there for each other, listen to each other and try to help, but in the end, we have to face it ourselves.
Why am I saying this? Because I feel that way. And I believe things should go that way for me. For now.
Sitting in a very quiet room and thinking, I feel so left out and out of place around the people that I know.
I envy people who can go out to eat with their family super peacefully. I envy people who have a very good relation with their family members despite all the problems.
I want to learn how to face problems. I want to learn how to walk away from problems yet solve them and just carry it as far as I can go. I don’t want to be someone that gets stuck when met with a hiccup. I don’t want to be someone that walks away from my own problems.
I want to realise that sometimes, things go wrong because of me.
***
31/12/2008.
Marks a very nice ending ever. Why? Because I spend last night all alone. Yes, it may not sound very nice to many but at the very least, I could spare myself some time to think.
Not to forget that I could watch my CSI Miami peacefully. Which is a good sign so that I can watch my Jonathan Togo. Gahaha.
And tonight will be the best night ever because I can watch my Taufik Batisah perform. Even better, I get to watch it all by myself. I mean seriously, since when my family ever stays up till so late at night, specially for me? Lets not talk about specially, lets talk with. Never.
And of course, I have someone special to put. No, not another picture of Taufik but this act cute person.
Okeh kidding.
See? I don’t forget and I’m not so bad. Hehhhh. Happy Anniversary! Ehem ehem. (:
***
Twillight yesterday and it was super awesome, criticising. Haha. You know me (or maybe you don’t), I love to make good stories bad. Popcorn was flying throughout the whole movie. All thanks to Farah and Haziq. Nabila and I were so innocent and quiet.
*Innocent face*
Yes Man last week was hilarious. And surprisingly, I was too preoccupied watching and didn’t talk that much. Hehe.
***
Now lets talk about new year resolutions. Unlike last year, I have some on my mind.
1. The result I got this year is super unacceptable. So I’m going to push myself to start doing things that can make those results improve tremendously.
2. To have my mind sort out. From big problems to small problems. Yea, it will be really difficult considering the kind of situation that I already am. But if there’s a will, there’s a way. I think.
3. Make my final decision. Throughout the whole holiday, I’ve been asking myself if I want to let go of any 1 of the 2 subjects that I have been trying my very best to succeed in but can’t seem to do it. I told someone that I don’t want to drop any because I don’t want to be look down upon. But really, comparing to be looked down or to have myself suffer, I wonder which is better.
4. Save money so that I can get things that I want without asking for any more money from parents. Buy what? Stuff like PSP and Taufik’s CD.
5. Not to go out so often unless necessary. Yes, this will be really difficult considering how itchy I can be when it comes to staying put at home. Boredom you see.
Alright, 5 is easy to be thought of, but certainly not easy to be done.
As for now, let me just go settle my homework before school reopens.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Have a great 2009. (:
Sweet Love.
Toodles.